XMen Institute 3: Ice Skating Mutants
by Rabbitearsblog
Summary: When Professor Xavier asks the X-Men to earn some money for the Institute, the X-Men decided to enter a skating contest to win the prize. However, hilarity ensures when the X-Men are having trouble practicing their skating moves!
1. Chapter 1

X-Men Institute #3: Ice Skating Mutants (An X-Men Fan Fiction)

Chapter 1: Money Trouble at the Institute!

It was a beautiful day at the Xavier Institute (as long as you don't have your usual mutant-hating crowds hanging out by the doors of the Institute trying to break in) and all was well with the students and the teachers at the Institute. Inside the Institute, two X-Men members (or teachers depending on what they are doing at this moment) are walking down the hallway discussing about how their day in teaching classes went.

"Alright, it's officially day two of teaching law class and the students hadn't even asked me about whether or not I was worthy of taking on the "law master" mantel," said Bobby Drake.

"I'm glad that the students are taking you seriously. Me and the others on the other hand, we're not so sure, but we're starting to believe it," said Scott Summers smiling.

"Very funny," Bobby muttered.

"Anyway, the students are starting to see that I'm not so stiff and boring as they originally thought," said Scott.

"Don't know about that," said Bobby to himself.

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," said Scott.

Suddenly, a voice rang out through the com system. "Attention, please! Will all staff members report immediately to Professor Xavier's office? This is an urgent matter that must be discussed as soon as possible!"

All of the teachers immediately ran towards Professor Xavier's office and when they arrived there, they started asking Professor Xavier all kinds of questions.

"Are Sentinels attacking the school?" asked Scott.

"Is Magneto up to his evil plans again?" asked Kurt.

"Is the world coming to an end as we know it?" asked Bobby dramatically.

"What?" Everyone asked looking at Bobby strangely.

"Well, no the Sentinels are not attacking the Institute and Magneto is not up to anything evil at the moment. And the world is most definitely not coming to an end. Actually, I have summoned you all here because we seem to be experiencing…financial difficulties for the Institute," said Professor Xavier.

Everyone looked at each other in a confusing way and then Jean Grey asked, "Financial difficulties?"

"Yes, it appears that during a field trip where I took the students to the Museum of Natural History, one of the students seem to have accidentally destroyed the dinosaur exhibit due to the fact that she had a fear of large reptiles (despite the fact that I was trying to explain to her that the dinosaurs in the exhibit were skeletons and they have been dead for over a million years now). So after that, I was forced to pay for the damages done to the exhibit, which had cost a vast amount of money," explained Professor Xavier.

"So why don't ya get back the funds for the Institute? I mean, you must be a millionaire or something to get this Institute started up, right?" asked Logan.

"In a way, yes Logan, but even a "millionaire" like I have limits in funding this Institute," said Professor Xavier.

"So you want us to find a way to provide funding for the Institute?" asked Ororo.

"Why yes Ororo! That is exactly why I have called you all here. To help this Institute received the funding it needs; you all must find a way to provide more funding for this Institute. I will try to provide as much funds as I can. However, the funds I provide might not be enough to sustain the Institute, so it would be more helpful if you all find some way to provide more funds for this Institute. I wish you all good luck!" said Professor Xavier.

As the X-Men left the office, Kitty said, "Umm… is it just me guys or is the Professor just using us to get more money for the school?"

"Well, there have been stranger cases, Katya. The question however is how we can manage to obtain more money for the Institute?" wondered Piotr.

"Well, my family is rich, so I could help out too," said Warren. Suddenly, Warren's cell phone rang and Warren answered it.

"Hello? Oh, hi father! How is everything with you? Uh huh…WHAT! What do you mean that the family funds are cut off? The bank accounts somehow froze up and you have to investigate? Oh no…well, let me know if things go well with the bank account. Goodbye father."

Warren put his cell phone away and said, "Well, this is bad news. My family's bank account has somehow frozen up. So now I officially can't help you guys out with the money."

"And your family's bank account somehow froze up at the same time we needed funds for the Institute. What a strange coincidence," commented Kurt.

"Indeed. Why do these things happen constantly? It's like we have an easy way out of a difficult situation and then somehow that simple way gets shattered at the last second. It's even worse in the superhero business," commented Hank.

"Well, I guess as superheroes we should be used to this by now. Anyway, we've been in tougher situations before but we always came out on top. So, let's try to get that money and help out the Institute!" said Scott valiantly.

"Great pep speech, Fearless Leader," said Logan sarcastically.

"Hey, don't push it Logan," said Scott.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Ice Skating Contest?

In the last chapter, the X-Men left the Institute to search for jobs that would help them earn money for the Institute. Waitress jobs, business corporations, anything to get some quick cash; but unfortunately, they were not really accepted at any jobs they applied for since the employers did not take lightly to mutants. When the employers found out that they were mutants, these revelations caused them to run away from the company buildings to get away from the X-Men and it prevented any of the X-Men members to get a proper interview.

"Man! This isn't going anywhere! I've tried to apply for a job at the social services and the minute the employers learned that I can phase through things, they just put down my application on the table and then jumped out the window," said Kitty frustrated.

"Well, at least you had it a little better than I did, Katya. I have tried to apply for a job at the construction site. However, when the other workers found out I could change my body into steel, they tried to throw rocks and sticks at me. However, one of the sticks accidentally bounced off my steel body and hit one of the switches on a tractor that was controlling the wrecking ball. The wrecking ball ended up hitting the nuclear plant which ended going up in flames," said Piotr.

Kitty looked at Piotr with her mouth wide opened and said, "What did you do about it?"

"Luckily, I ran inside the nuclear plant and managed to save all the workers who were inside. Then I had to run away because I saw police cars and lawyers coming towards the plant and I did not want to risk getting the Institute sued for whatever crime they were going to put on me," said Piotr.

"Good call," said Kitty relieved.

"Thank you," said Piotr smiling.

"Well, it looks like our chances of obtaining a job is looking slim," said Hank.

"Yeah," everyone agreed, looking glum.

Suddenly, the X-Men saw a poster on an old building that stated that a figure skating contest is being held at the skating ring. The winner of the figure skating contest will receive five-thousand dollars as an award.

"FIVE-THOUSAND FREAKING DOLLARS?!" everyone screamed out.

"This is awesome! We can get five-thousand dollars for the institute easy!" said Bobby happily.

"Except for one problem mien Freud. Does anyone know how to ice skate?" asked Kurt.

"No!" everyone said shamelessly.

"Well, it's either ice skating or wearing pretty little aprons and dresses for some waitressing job in a night club," said Scott.

"Ice skating it is!" said Warren.

"So to prepare for the contest, we got to practice long and hard every day until the day of the contest arrives," declared Scott.

"Hard practice for days? Yuck! Now I regret getting excited for this thing," said Bobby.

"Nice pep talk, Bub. But you ain't got a chance against me on the ring," said Logan smirking.

Scott looked at Logan oddly and then smirked himself and said, "Well then Logan, let's see which one of us can skate the best."

"And here we go," Jean Grey muttered.

The next day, during the afternoon, the X-Men went to the skating ring to practice some skating moves for the contest. Near the edge of the skating ring, Logan and Scott were preparing themselves to race against each other on the skating ring by putting on their snow outfits while laughing to themselves.

When they finished dressing up, Logan and Scott started walking towards the ring and then they both yelled out, "Let's go!"

And as soon as they both put their foot on the ice, they both slipped and fell over backwards on their backs and started moaning uncontrollably.

"Maybe these two should try to practice standing up on the ice first before they skate," said Ororo chuckling to herself.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Practice Makes Perfect!

The X-Men continued to practice skating on the ring, trying out different figure skating moves to use in the ice skating contest. Unfortunately, things are not going well for our mutant heroes since they can't skate at all!

"Come on Scott! Let's keep practicing! The contest is in two days and we all still haven't mastered the basics of skating!" said Jean Grey, skating ahead while grabbing Scott's hands.

"Sorry Jean, but leading a team of mutants through the battlefield is way different than trying to skate without falling on your face and risking total humiliation for eons," said Scott, fighting to stand up straight.

"Aw, don't worry! We'll get the hang of it soon," said Jean Grey brightly.

"You mean you'll get the hang of it. I will have to try to avoid getting any kind of injuries before the contest comes or we're sunk," said Scott, still struggling.

On the far side of the skating ring, Bobby Drake is using his ice powers to easily skate on the ice by shooting out an ice bridge underneath him and skating on top of it.

"Hey look! I'm skating away, baby!" yelled Bobby happily.

"I think that's cheating," said Hank, looking on.

"So? It's not like the usual cool moves I show in the missions we go on," said Bobby slyly.

On another corner of the skating ring, Kurt and Warren were practicing spinning around on the ice.

"Whew! I do not think I can whirl around anymore, mien Freud," said Kurt, all tired out.

"That's alright Kurt! I'll just practice my spinning moves on the ice while you count how many spins I do. Ready?" asked Warren.

"Ready!" said Kurt.

Warren then started spinning slowly at first with Kurt counting, "1…2…3…4…5…6…"

On the other side of the skating ring, Kitty and Piotr are practicing the throw jump, where Piotr is planning on throwing Kitty high up into the air.

"Um, Peter? Have you ever tried this move before?" asked Kitty worriedly.

"Nyet, but do not worry Katya. With enough practice, we should be able to get this move right," said Piotr, with false confidence.

"Alright," said Kitty worriedly.

Piotr then lowered Kitty and with a small grunt, he threw her up into the air. Unfortunately, he threw her a little too high up into the air…

"Uh oh," said Piotr, as he watched Kitty sailed through the air.

Kitty was screaming like crazy, waving her arms wildly and was yelling out, "OH MY GOD! I'm going to end up into the stratosphere unless I do something! DO SOMETHING, DARN IT!"

Kitty was heading straight for the roof of the skating ring until she phased through it! Then a few minutes later, Kitty phased back through the roof and was walking on air back towards the skating ring down below.

Piotr quickly skated over to her as she reached the ring and asked, "Are you alright?"

Kitty looked up at Piotr and said, "I'm fine. I'm just wallowing in embarrassment because in my moment of panic, I forgot I could just phase away into the roof and come back down like nothing happened."

"It was definitely…unusual," said Piotr.

"It was totally your fault," said Kitty with her arms crossed.

"I like to think so, yes," said Piotr smirking.

Kitty smirked at Piotr too and said," Aww…I can't stay mad at you!" and she went and gave Piotr a big kiss on the lips.

Cue back to Warren and Kurt, where Warren is still spinning around while Kurt is still counting, "…24…25…26…27…28…29…30…"

In the other corner of the ring, Ororo was practicing the axel jump where she jumps into the air and lands by gliding backwards. Logan just stood by the sidelines.

"Come on Logan! You must practice for the skating competition or we will never earn the money to support the school," said Ororo.

"Forget it! I ain't practicing no sissy moves like that, just so we can get Chuck some money for the school," Logan growled.

Ororo then skated towards Logan and looked him straight in the eye and said, "If you do not participate in this sport…"

"Don't try to threaten me with lightning bolts. I got healing powers, you know," said Logan.

"I was not going to threaten you with lightning bolts. I was just going to say that if you do not participate in this event, we will take away all of your beers for the next three months," Ororo finished.

Logan just looked at Ororo with a scowl on his face and then he said, "Come on, let's get this skating thing out of the way."

And now we head back to Warren and Kurt! Kurt finally finishes counting and said, "45…46…47…48…49…50! Wow! That was splendid Warren! I have never seen anyone done so many spins in my entire life!"

Warren stopped and he was about to speak, when he threw his hand over his mouth and skated quickly to the wastebasket. Once at the wastebasket, Warren started vomiting like crazy.

"Umm…well, at least he broke a record for the most spins done in one area," said Kurt uncomfortably.

At the other corner of the skating ring, Bobby skates over to Piotr and asks him, "Hey Peter! You're Russian right? Can you do the Russian split?"

Piotr looked at Bobby and said, "Well, yes. I am Russian, but just because I am Russian it does not mean that I could do the Russian split. That is like saying that French toast is from France because the toast is called "French."

Bobby looked at Piotr strangely and said, "Okay, that was so random."

"I know, but since we were on the subject of how some countries' nationalities are being used to name certain objects, I thought I should bring that point out," Piotr smiled and then said, "Oh, excuse me for going off subject. As for the Russian split, I could try out the move."

Piotr then positioned himself and leaped into the air and performed a split jump while his body formed a "v" shape. However, as soon as Piotr leaped back down, he ended up falling on the ice on his bottom and the ice started to crack slightly.

"Oh my god! The ice!" yelled Bobby.

"Oh dear god! My rump!" yelled Piotr.

"Don't worry Peter! I'm coming!" yelled Kitty.

Kitty and Bobby then started trying to pull Piotr out of the ice, grunting with much effort.

Scott and Jean Grey were staring at the other X-Men struggling with the skating moves and Jean Grey said, "Well, at least they're getting better at skating. We might actually have a shot at this championship."

Scott grunted as he tried to stand up and said, "Yeah, that's if we don't destroy the skating ring in a matter of seconds. But still, we won't give up! As X-Men, we have to keep going until we are able to beat the odds at the skating competition and get that money!"

Then Scott fell down on the ice and Jean Grey said, "Uh baby? Why don't you try doing the pep speech while standing up on the ice?"

Scott just looked up at Jean Grey and said, "This is going to be the longest training session of my entire life."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Let the Contest Begin!

The X-Men had trained long and hard for the ice skating championship (with a few bruises here and there). However, their training had finally paid off as the day of the ice skating championship had finally arrived! Inside the skating ring, all of the contestants are briefly practicing their moves for the competition, while the X-Men were in the dressing rooms preparing themselves for the championship.

"Aw man! Why do we have to wear these sissy tights?" complained Bobby.

"Well, it's a part of the rules Bobby. You didn't think that we were competing in jeans and T-shirts, did you?" asked Warren.

"Well, I would rather compete in jeans than wear these tights and looking like I just came out of a ballet class. Although, I will admit that we would seriously get some major wedgies if we wore our jeans while skating," said Bobby.

"Well it could have been worse. We could have been playing guitars and drums while we were skating. Now, that would be a sight to behold," said Hank.

"And we would have fell on our butts in the process trying to master holding the drums and guitars while skating," said Scott.

Suddenly, Kurt teleported in front of the guys in a cloud smelling of brimstone and said: "Hey everyone! The championship is going to start in five minutes! We better get ready!"

"Hey Kurt, where's Logan and Peter?" asked Bobby.

"Oh, Logan really did not want to wear his skating uniform. So, Peter had to turn into his steel form to hold Logan down and get the uniform on him. And, they should be coming out right about now," said Kurt.

Logan came out with his blue and yellow skating uniform, looking extremely agitated at having to be forced into wearing that uniform.

"Hey Logan…" began Bobby.

"SHUT UP!" yelled Logan.

"Okay!" said Bobby backing away slightly.

Then Piotr came after Logan with his red and yellow skating uniform and looked exhausted.

"Boize Moi! It was hard trying to get that uniform onto Logan. I thought I was going to die in there, but I have managed to get the uniform on him! It is a wonder about how powerful steel can really be," said Piotr, a bit relieved.

"Hey, you're lucky I didn't take my claws and stick them up your butt!" said Logan angrily.

Suddenly, a voice over the intercom came on and said: "Attention all ice skating contestants! Please report to the skating ring immediately for the championship!"

"Oh! That's our cue!" said Warren.

All the male X-Men members quickly came out of the dressing room and began running towards the skating ring. It was then that they met up with the female X-Men members.

"Hey girls! Wow, all of you are looking good!" said Bobby.

"Thanks Bobby! I never would have thought that some flowery looking skating uniforms would make us look nice for some serious competition," said Jean Grey.

"Ugh! This suit is still so tight on me! These are uniforms that would have fitted better if I was a seriously super skinny model," said Kitty.

"Well, perhaps it will not be so bad. This is probably the first and last time we will participate in a skating competition," said Ororo, tugging at her black and white skating uniform.

"Well, not only do we have to worry about our uniforms, but Kurt and I took the liberty to make sure our holographic inducers are working so that way, no one will be running and screaming the moment they see two blue 'Cookie Monsters' on the skating ring," said Hank.

"Hey! I am not a cookie monster!" said Kurt irritably.

"Sorry, but I do think being called a 'cookie monster' lessens the furry blue monster nature a bit don't you?" asked Hank.

Kurt looked at Hank briefly and said, "I suppose, although now you just gave everyone a new nickname to call us now."

Everyone laughed until a booming voice came over the intercom and stated in a grand voice: "Ladies and Gentlemen! Welcome to the National Ice Skating Championship! Today we will see many talented skaters showing off their abilities as they compete for the five-thousand dollar grand prize!"

"Five-thousand dollars, five-thousand dollars, five-thousand dollars…" said Bobby to himself.

"Keep on saying that, Bobby. The five-thousand dollars will still be there until someone (hopefully us) wins it," said Scott.

The booming voice continued, "So everyone, give us your best cheers for these competitors of the ice skating championship!"

The audience then began cheering loudly as the ice skating competition began. As the first set of skaters began twirling on the ring, Warren looked at the skaters who were spinning around and started to look a bit green.

"Hey Warren! Are you okay?" asked Jean Grey.

Warren said sickly, "Sorry, but after doing all of those spins during practice, just seeing these skaters spin around is making me feel nauseous again…" Warren then put a hand over his mouth again and started running towards the back of the ring. The X-Men then heard more vomiting in the back.

"Do you think that he will be okay in the competition?" asked Kurt concerned.

"Well, I would want him to sit this out, but we got no replacements. So, hopefully, he'll be alright. Hopefully…" said Scott.

Finally, it was the X-Men's turns to compete in the skating ring and since the competition starts off with the skating pair contest, Kitty and Piotr was the first pair to go up.

"Good luck you two!" cheered Jean Grey.

"Thanks!" said Piotr and Kitty together and they both began skating on the ring.

At first, everything was going well for the cute couple as they performed the unison skating and the Russian splits perfectly. But then, they began to try the dreaded throw jump!

"Alright Peter! Please don't throw me up too high again!" whispered Kitty worriedly.

"Do not worry Katya! After doing this move for the past twelve times, I think I am able to suppress my strength long enough to pull this off," said Piotr confidently.

Piotr then began to lift Kitty and then threw her up in the air. Suddenly, Piotr glimpsed something red and cuddly underneath Kitty's skirt and looked shocked for a moment. However, despite his shock, he was able to catch Kitty easily, finishing the skating move.

"And there you have it folks! Let's hear it for the cute skating couple!"

The audience cheered wildly as Kitty and Piotr skated back towards the edge of the ring.

"You two were fantastic!" complimented Kurt.

"I think we really got this thing in the bag!" said Bobby cheerfully.

"Thanks you guys!" said Kitty proudly.

Piotr just looked at the others with a spaced out look in his eyes. "Peter? What's wrong?" asked Kitty. Piotr looked at Kitty, turned her gently away from the group and whispered in her ear, "Katya, you did not tell me that you wear Elmo underwear."

Kitty looked shocked for a moment and then grabbed Piotr lightly by the ear and said, "And if you mentioned this to anyone, we won't kiss in the 'comfy' parts of the hallways ever again."

"I understand, Katya. And my ears will understand too as soon as you released them," said Piotr smirking.

Next couple up was Scott and Jean Grey and they began the ice dancing technique where they both did a choreographed dance together. Both Scott and Jean Grey were doing the moves so well that the audience were cheering loudly for them.

"What a spectacular finish! Let's hear it for the perfect couple!" yelled the announcer.

Scott and Jean Grey started skating towards the back of the skating ring.

"See, Scott? I told you it would be easier skating once you get the hang of it!" said Jean Grey smiling.

"Yeah, I will admit that I'm glad that I didn't fall on my face this time. Or for the twelfth time this week," said Scott, making Jean Grey giggle.

Afterwards, the other X-Men began doing their skating moves and all of them were doing extremely well (with the exception of Warren almost throwing up on the ring when he did the spinning moves and Logan almost jumping at a man who insulted his uniform during his performance with Ororo).

Finally, the competition was coming to a close and the announcer stated, "Well ladies and gentlemen! We have just witnessed the brilliant techniques shown by all of our competitors! And now, for the moment you all have been waiting for…"

Suddenly, an assistant came and whispered into the announcer's ears. The announcer then cleared his throat and said, "Ahem! Ladies and gentlemen, it seems like we have accidentally missed two more competitors in this competition. So, allow us to introduce our two new competitors…ROGUE and GAMBIT!"


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: And the winner is…

"WHAT THE FREAKING HECK!?" all the other X-Men yelled out.

Rogue and Gambit then began skating out into the ring, with their skating uniforms glittering in spotlight and then they began doing some impressive moves. First, they did the death spiral, where Rogue was skating on a deep edge with her body close to the ice and was skating in circles around Gambit who was in a low pivot and holding her arm. Then they performed the side by side techniques as they started spinning and jumping next to each other. After they finished their skating moves, the crowd cheered wildly and the announcer shouted out:

"Fantastic! Let's hear it for our new skating couple: ROGUE and GAMBIT!"

After the audience's cheering died down, the moment had finally arrived (again) to announce the winner of the skating competition.

"Alright, ladies and gentlemen! Now that everyone has finally competed, it's time to announce the winners of the skating competition. Drum rolls, please."

A dramatic drum roll then sounded out and the announcer said excitedly, "And the winners for the National Ice Skating Competition are… ROGUE and GAMBIT!"

The audience cheered wildly (the loudest cheering coming from the X-Men since now they won the money) and Rogue and Gambit went to get their prize.

"Congratulations! You two have won the five-thousand dollar grand prize! And now, what are you two going to do with the grand prize?"

"Well sugah, me and my skating partner here are goin' to give this money to tha school ta help the little ones with their education," said Rogue smiling.

"Ya, mon ami. Let's just say dat dis here money is representin' da children who need a school t' git some serious learnin'," said Remy.

"Well, that is truly inspiring! Let's hear it for our two charitable winners ladies and gentlemen!"

The audience then cheered wildly at Rogue and Gambit and Rogue and Gambit then skated towards the back of the arena.

"Rogue! Remy! Hey! How and when?" asked Scott.

"Well, as for tha how sugah, we just up and decided that we wanted ta try out skating and give this thing a whirl!" said Rogue.

"Not t' mention we git some good ole publicity in being da best skating couple eva!" said Remy.

"Professor X con you guys into this didn't he?" asked Bobby.

"Like a moth to a flame," said Rogue and Remy together.

"Well, at least we got the prize money!" said Jean Grey happily.

"I'll say. Let's go back to the Institute and give this money to the Professor!" said Scott.

"YAY!" everyone yelled out and they exited with the crowd.

A couple of hours later at the Institute…

"Well done everyone! Now the Institute is able to sustain itself on the funds that you have honorably won!" said Professor Xavier happily.

"Yeah well…" everyone started mumbling, happy that they were able to help out with the finances of the Institute.

"However, there is one other thing I wanted all of you to help out with. You see, we will be receiving visitors from two elementary schools from downtown. The teachers at the elementary schools are so impressed by the education that we have given the students here that they want to come and visit the Institute with the kindergartners! So I took the liberty to set you all up with your assigned groups of kindergartners and have you showed them around the school while watching over them!" said Professor Xavier.

The X-Men then looked at each other wildly and they all screamed out:

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO O!"


End file.
